Top Comments: Did You Know...

The other day I bought a small little book, Ignorance Is Blitz, by Professor Anders Henriksson. It begins by talking about the job of a historian and then takes the reader on a trip through history through the eyes of some pretty interesting college students. I'm wondering how these students ever got into college, and I'm hoping none of them passed without some pretty serious hard work. This book is hilarious though. I figured I'd offer up a few excerpts and then we could get to the top comments.

These are actual responses from students - either from papers or from exams:

• The major cause of the Civil War is when slavery spread its ugly testicles across the West.
• A factor in this was the Dead Scot decision. This case made a bang in President Buckanon.
• The Civil War began in 1830. Many soldiers repeatedly gave their lives for their country.
• The Confederates were greatly damaged by navel blockage.

Any teachers out there have memorable moments from students? Feel free to add them in the comments!

Here's a bit more:

The Civil Rights movement in the USA turned around the corner with Martin Luther Junior's famous "If I Had a Hammer" speech. Martian Luther King's four steps to direct action included self purification, when you allow yourself to be eaten to a pulp. The wealing and dealing of President Lynda B. Johnson was another important factor.

And perhaps the one that makes me laugh the most - from the Epilogue, "Sandy Arabia and the Palaced Indians":

Women are very oppressed in Iran, where they are forced to be in a chapati for all activities. The idea here is to keep them barefoot and childproof. Shiites are Islamic Feminists.

The main problem in the Middle East today is that there are problems. There would not be all these problems if the West Bank would lend more money to the Arabs and if the Palaced Indians were not so troublesome. Many of the countries suffer rule by monocolism.

Here are some Top Comments (thank goodness most Kossacks are smarter than these kids!):

From be the change you seek:

As someone who flunked gym, the comment by jeepdad in response to one by kaydub made me laugh out loud.

From terrypinder:

cookiesandmilk knows how to calculate Superdelegates.

From gizmo59:

The funniest comment I saw today was this one made by Seneca Doane in JeffLieber's most diverting diary.

From willb48:

This comment, by Neon Vincent, got a laugh from me.  It all started out with a comment on John McCain's being disconstipated.

From paintitblue:

The comment is by "cmnh" and is found here in response to LarsThorwald's comment here.

From malharden:

PocketNines with the mother of all metaphors in BarryinMIA's latest screed.

From FishOutofWater:

Freelunch's ditty on thousand dollar hotdogs.

From Land of Enchantment:

If you can believe it:  A "fresh" perspective on the polls!  First from poblano in the Momentumless Primary diary, then from PointGuard in a comment therein.

Unfortunately, I was busy as a bee with work all day, so I was unable to look for comment nominations myself. Hopefully you enjoy these great choices by the many excellent nominators!

Give some props to BeninSC for compiling the Top Mojo for us!

Top Mojo - excluding search-identifiable tip jars and first diary comments (top 22 tonight of each plus ties):

1 Don't know how by Borell - 756
2 Nah, don't rub it in by Cali Scribe - 185
3 How do I do that? by wayne204 - 144
4 Didn't mean to offend by doribell - 143
5 Unfortunately, I'm headed to the airport by YesWeKen - 109
6 For someone who is "throughly vetted" by smash artist - 109
7 she anewered your question. by notquitedelilah - 106
8 Laugh out loud by Kitty - 98
9 Saw them both in ND on Friday... by Prairie Logic - 91
10 I'm really jealous of you. by christine20 - 89
11 Great diary - send it to media for print!! by SpringFever - 86
12 Many here remember I too supported Hillary by John Campanelli - 84
13 it's not a sport. by Briee - 82
14 He's not a politician by jabbausaf - 82
15 And people scoff at the term 'fascist' by realwischeese - 81
16 great diary! by slinkerwink - 79
17 Clinton:  "Politics IS nasty, child." by Torta - 79
18 that's the problem with bragadoccio by louisev - 79
19 Congratulations to you by MadRuth - 78
20 This is something she will treasure by ScientistMom in NY - 77
21 A crime to be a democrat by davefromqueens - 75
22 I keep saying by jiordan - 75
23 I edited your headline. In the body of the ... by Meteor Blades - 75
24 My first thought! by bethcf4p - 74
25 Well done. by djtyg - 73
26 ABSOLUTELY by thorn70 - 72
27 She really answered your question later by shruticounseling - 71
28 Just Once I'd Like For Someone To Respond by terry2wa - 63
29 I get the feeling when I see pictures of Barack by laderrick - 61
30 relevant quote by NCrefugee - 61

Top Mojo - everything included:

1 Tip Jar by The Great Gatsby - 1040
2 Don't know how by Borell - 756
3 Tip Jar by John Campanelli - 595
4 Tips for the enthusiastic pre-voters! by YesWeKen - 511
5 Thank you for reading. by droogie6655321 - 458
6 If Rove doesn't belong in jail, Nobody does. by xxdr zombiexx - 322
7 And now I'm off to make some more bracelets. n/t by StrangeAnimals - 294
8 tip jar by poblano - 234
9 Cool story... by sheddhead - 230
10 Tips / Mojo: 7 April 2008 by A Siegel - 203
11 Even people in Washington... by Larry Kissell - 187
12 Nah, don't rub it in by Cali Scribe - 185
13 Tips For A New Diarist? by JTRicher - 174
14 offered for your kind consideration by teacherken - 172
15 How do I do that? by wayne204 - 144
16 Didn't mean to offend by doribell - 143
17 Tip Jar by wayne204 - 138
18 We must change the way we think by FishOutofWater - 114
19 I imagine that these people are going to be by smash artist - 112
20 Unfortunately, I'm headed to the airport by YesWeKen - 109
21 For someone who is "throughly vetted" by smash artist - 109
22 she anewered your question. by notquitedelilah - 106
23 tips/recs by icebergslim - 101
24 Laugh out loud by Kitty - 98
25 Moonbat's feeding bowl by Unitary Moonbat - 93
26 Great!!!  Recced & Persuasive!!! by serrano - 92
27 May we always remember their sacrifices by greenies - 91
28 Saw them both in ND on Friday... by Prairie Logic - 91
29 I'm really jealous of you. by christine20 - 89
30 Great diary - send it to media for print!! by SpringFever - 86